We lost this guy exactly a week ago, down to the minute. I feel his absence in every cell of my being. He passed away an hour before my husband and I got on a plane home bound from a weekend trip. He waited just minutes after my brother and my sister-in-law, who had brought him to the vet, left to pick up their daughter from school. It was as if he didn’t want us to witness his departure.
At home he was rarely more than a few feet away from me. While we ate, he would lay down by our feet and patiently wait. Before he was put on a strict diet, he would sit and watch us eagerly, waiting for table scraps. While I read on the couch, he’d nap by my feet. When I went to the bedroom he would follow dutifully; if he wasn’t allowed inside the room (because he was a shedder and the carpet would smell like him for days), he would plunk himself on the rug just outside the door. When I picked my son up from school, sometimes I would let him come along; he loved being in the car and looking out the window, whining softly when he’d spot other dogs along the way. When he was left at home and we honked the horn to signal our arrival, he would howl his beagle howl in excitement and greet us with his soulful eyes and soft whimpers, anticipating the belly rubs and cuddles that were sure to come.
Now my feet brush empty space when I’m at the table. I haven’t sat in the living room for more than five minutes this past week because I feel the crushing weight of his absence there the most. Now I wish the whole house smelled of him. I breathe in his scent from his empty collar and dread the day that it won’t smell of him anymore.
I haven’t been around people outside my family since we said our final goodbyes to him. It’s still so hard to talk about him without falling apart. I used to have music on all the time - while reading, cooking and eating, in the shower, in the car. Now I cherish the silence and pay closer attention to my thoughts. Thoughts of him, of life, of mundane things, of what matters most.
We got his ashes back yesterday. Somehow the weight on my chest has lifted a fraction, although there will always be a hole there. Charlie is home now.
Reasons I’m feeling this week
1. I’m starting @rachael_attard ‘s lean legs 8 week program for that extra confidence boost when I’m prancing in bikinis next month (stay posted for a review)
2. Heading up to beautiful Cape Town which means I get to flow in my favorite space @wildthingmoves 😍
8 913 hours ago
22.01.18 - Gratitude 🙏
I fell immensely in love with yoga when I started to practice with @yogamovement after my wrist reconstruction in 2015. Fast forward 3 years later, here I am, teaching my 1st class with them this Friday. ❤
I decided to take this leap of faith in December 2017 and I'm giving myself a huge pat on the back for that leap. 👋
Thank you to each and everyone of you who believed in me, you know who you are and no words can describe how thankful and grateful I am for your love. 🕉
Please forgive me as I may fumble, I may crumble, I may make mistakes and I may fall, but I promise to get up stronger each time and strive to be a better teacher for you, and for myself. Namaste. 🙏
"Doing what you love is freedom. Loving what you do is happiness." 🦄
This trip has been a big practice of being present. Soaking in all that I can. Not missing the funny jokes or sass the Vietnamese give us. Not closing my eyes to miss the hundredth rice paddy. Not allowing the soft rain to disappoint me. And only choosing to smile (even I’m feeling a little moody and want to be grumpy). It’s time to enjoy what’s in front of us, make the most with what we’ve got and laugh at the small things.
3 1353 hours ago
✨💕💖 #Repost via the lovely @Athathum from that one fine day in an LA warehouse, women supporting women in a campaign to endorse yoga for @Athleta, grateful to share that beautiful experience modeling and practicing #yoga with these amazing women, support and love to all. ✨💕💖I am proud of & inspired by the hundreds of thousands of people who gathered energy to peacefully protest a year into this regime that feels like something out of a poorly written dystopian novel. I, for one, feel helpless facing the slough of shots fired against immigrants & refugees, women, the queer community, the environment, the public education system... the list goes on & on. being a part of this larger hive mind of individuals oriented toward intersectionality gives me some hope and encouragement through these trying times. may we move forward with patience, perseverance & potency. ✨💖💕 #Love#LoveAndAllIsComing#PracticeAndAllIsComing#WomenSupportingWomen#Yogini#Ioga#PartnerAcro✨💕💖
Subtle adjustments to finding balance ✨
Many of my yogi students and IG friends are on their journey to finding balance in headstand, pincha, or handstand. I always applaud them for embarking on this journey because it can be so long and frustrating. It takes tremendous perseverance to locate the exact muscles to engage in order to find the perfect balance, and tremendous willingness to try again and again after bailing countless times. It can feel really impossible. .
To anyone who is going through a tough time getting to that "next level" (in yoga or in life), I hope you stay the course and know that #practiceandalliscoming -- and I hope your breakthrough is just around the corner. ✨
I was reminded of this today when I came across this photo by chance. I still find it hard to believe that I was brave enough to try this hollowback pincha up on a concrete ledge after the sun had gone down...but @catherinebyrdy always brings out the best in me 😘🙏
Goodnight and namaste, everyone!
11 1225 hours ago
So we try, once and again... and maybe we are wrong and we just need to let it be.
Ma Kālī (/ˈkɑːli/ ; Sanskrit : काली), also known as Kālikā (Sanskrit : कालिका), is a Hindu Goddess .
Goddess Kālī also shares the meaning of "time" or "the fullness of time" with the masculine noun "kāla"—and by extension, time as "changing aspect of nature that bring things to life or death." Kali in Hinduism, is a manifestation of the Divine Mother, which represents the female principle. Frequently, those not comprehending her many roles in life call Kali the goddess of destruction. She destroys only to recreate, and what she destroys is sin, ignorance and decay. She is equated with the eternal night, is the transcendent power of time, and is the consort of the God Shiva. It is believed that its Shiva who destroys the world, and Kali is the power or energy with which Shiva acts. Therefore, Kali is Shiva's shakti, without which Shiva could not act. Kali receives her name because she devours kala (Time) and then resumes her own dark formlessness.
Source: Wiki and other websites combined. My knowledge wouldn't have taken you anywhere much,lol. Despite of being a Hindu, I am not at all into religious beliefs however I've never disrespected anyone who does though.😊 Be it mine or other's religions, I respect 'em all equally.
Day 1 of •| #DivinelyYoga |•
Theme: Goddess Kali with Goddess Pose.
I wanted to get creative with today's theme through make up and get up wise in Kali avatar but its just not going anywhere. I messed up and look like a devil instead and I suspect Goddess Kali would have wore my skull if seen me in devil's avatar lol. 😂😁 So sharing just another pic instead.☺ For more details on our theme today, remember to check with my co-hosts.
Our generous sponsors:
Debes poder moverte con libertad dentro y fuera de tu mente, eso es ser libre. 🍂
5 1366 hours ago
|| Hips don’t lie || It’s slight, but if you look closely you can see the lateral tilt of my pelvis. It’s actually a lot better than it was in the past! However, I have been neglecting caring for it for sometime now. I took this pic about a week ago and since then I have been inspired to start back up with my exercises and myofascial release - so far so good! Wish me luck and fingers crossed that I keep up with it. Feel free to ask me how it’s going #accountabilibuddy and join me in class this week because... Yoga.
10am | Power | @komrogers
12noon | Flow 45 | @komrogers
4:30pm | SLOFlow | @trailsideyoga (subbing for @spirit_heeler )
TUESDAY + THURSDAY:
8:30am | Vinyasa | @trailsideyoga
12noon | Lunch Break | @beewellyoga
10am | FREE for Cancer Survivors | @trailsideyoga via The Buddy Project
12noon | Flow 45 | @komrogers
4:30pm | Dynamic Flow | yogagypsystudio
SATURDAY + SUNDAY:
9:30am | Vinyasa | @trailsideyoga
6 676 hours ago
We refuse to be weighed down by gravity.
So we strengthen ourselves to carry it.
Make ourselves flexible like Tetris.
Until one day gravity no longer applies.
Feat: @jigglypuff_916 & tunshica velvet 💕
4 566 hours ago
“The soul should always stand ajar, ready to welcome the ecstatic experience.” -Emily Dickinson
9 1416 hours ago
.M O M G U I L T.
It's a real thing and last night I had it bad. Brenton and I went on a late night "date" to...Whole Foods 🤣 while my parents watched Amie. The plan was to get some gf and dairy free treats for the night before the store closed, but right as we were about to walk through the doors, we realized that B had left his wallet. We got back in the car and decided to forget the whole thing.
It didn't take long for me to start crying. Poor B thought I was mad at him for forgetting his wallet, but after some prying I started to open up. I told him that the trip to WF felt symbolic of how life has been lately. I'll try to take a nap, but then Amie wakes up and needs to eat. I try to do some yoga, but then Amie starts having a melt down and will only be soothed by me. I have a list of things to do for the day, but Amie won't let me put her down. I often feel so close to doing what I want or need to do, but then something happens with Amélie and I need to go back to take care of her.
And then instantly after I said that out loud. I felt so guilty. I love my baby with all my heart and there is absolutely nothing I wouldn't do for her and by saying all that out loud it makes it seem like I don't love her as much as I do. I feel lucky that I get to be home right now and spend so much time with her, so how can I be so selfish and complain? In that moment I felt like such a bad mom, like a really terrible one. I started crying even more and felt my heart aching in different directions. The frustration about not being able to do some of the things that I want to do during the day was truly how I felt, but I've been trying to suppress it to try to be the best mom that I can be.
But of course, B made me feel better as he always does. He reminded me that becoming a mom doesn't mean that I have to lose who I am and drop everything. I need and deserve to take time for myself each day, so that I can fulfill my whole being. He said that the frustrations that I have are normal and completely understandable especially since I'm exclusively breastfeeding (Amie won't take the bottle right now) and she tends to eat every hour and a half. •
👇🏽Keep reading below
The Yoga Love Dare Challenge with @yogawithdavina
Day 7 Honesty
To be honest and not let ego get in the way. This has been key in my practice and in life. Fear of failure is something I am working to overcome. I need to remind myself that if we fail at something, that is one way that we can learn and continue to grow.
I had to get real with myself this morning. I had to tell myself to stop being lazy and get out of my comfy bed and go celebrate my dear friend @beckyyy_89 birthday. I am so happy that I was able to spend time with her! I am looking forward to our book club that we are starting!
It is hard to look back and say “I wish I would have done this or that” and that can really beat you up. I tend to set these expectations of how life should be. It doesn’t always work out the way that I had imagined it and sometimes that is because I let fear of failure hold me back from speaking from the heart. That is my work in progress and they are baby steps for now. My relationships and I are continuing to grow and evolve into a more amazing, beautiful and loving connections, it just makes me smile.
1 227 hours ago
Going all out for the impossibles, because your gear make it possible.
Featured: Empower Active Sports Bra and Merriment Mesh Performance Tights (Classic Black)
I continue releasing today with #legsupthewall and recharging a little bit with my bottoms off the floor. When I first attempted this pose even without my bottoms off the floor, I was proven wrong for thinking it was easy. It is not! But of course, with everything at all, with practice and patience come ease. So, keep at your practice and one day, you’ll photograph yourself and look back at the photos, wondering if you are superhuman... And, you are! Coz you are the universe in ecstatic motion. Don’t believe me? Try learning about yourself deeper and loving yourself harder and then you’ll see ✨ I didn’t take any pictures post yoga with my dad this morning. We did a casual one revisiting the poses that I introduced to him last week. And I was very casual too in my sleeping clothes 🤟🏽🤪 so no pictures lah. Next toime okay! Anyway, I hope that you’ll release what no longer serves you with every exhale and light stretches and recharge with deep inhales also with light stretches from time to time (or the whole 20min yoga flow terus!) throughout the week to maintain your superhuman-ness ok! Lotsa love, have an amazing week ahead! 😘
Creative Hosts 🤸🏻♀️:
Generous Sponsors 🎉: @balion.no@healthystepsecostore@email@example.com#ReleaseAndRecharge ✨
5 1247 hours ago
It was a gloomy, rainy day in the #pnw, which turned into a quiet, beautiful hike up to a local lake. Today I hiked with a friend, and we both shared and processed stories of holiday time with family. Connecting with nature and a dear friend felt healing in places I didn’t even realize needed it. ❤️🍁
Yoga is a human experience. It sees no race, gender, creed, orientation or age. The space where practice occurs is safe and welcoming to all who enter. 📸 by @lola_la_showgirl
4 697 hours ago
Popular Instagram Photos
Thank you for all the love on my new pixie cut. I loved reading your comments.
You know, I’ve had long hair all of my life and somehow it never really occurred to me that I could cut it.
When I met Ezra a couple of years ago, he looked at me and said “you should cut your hair short like a pixie”. But I just laughed/cringed at the thought and moved on.
I have. And I guess my hair is in on it too.
I made a story a few weeks ago asking for hair artists and my friend @chaumetclotilde connected me with @atelier_ismerie. (They’re both amazing- if you’re in Paris- you’re lucky!)
Anyway- I messaged Ismérie and she was shocked (and excited) when I told her I wanted a pixie!
I kept it a secret. It’s best this way. I’ve learned that speaking about changes with others is a no- no. It builds doubt, pressure and expectation. 🤨🙃
And so I had this little secret that I would come to Paris and become a pixie. 🧚♂️
The whole process was easy. I trusted Ismérie from the start and was so happy to also donate my long hair.
I felt very liberated and kind of high the hours after the cut.
Now, I can’t believe it took me almost 30 years to do this. I feel more like myself than ever before.
Plus as some of you rightly commented- much better for mom life.
No more getting hair yanked, no more looking for hair ties. Plus- how fun to do halasana without a ponytail. YAS to renewal. ✨
Be more present,
Be more love & light, ✨
Be a better wife,
better sister, daughter and friend 💭
just popped a little blog post talking about what I want to BE & DO more this year, every year 〰️ link is in bio. ☺️Have a read and tell me yours below. 💕🙏🏻 photo by my amazing @juliaotestphoto
46 6083 days ago
Perfection is an illusion, there is only process.
12 1073 days ago
Hey! 🤗 Remember to create your own sunshine & happiness this week ✨🌵🌛 do whatever feels good for YOU / For me it was canceling my workout & staying home to cook with husband and get shizz done today. 💁🏼♀️ Tell me yours 👇🏻( p.s. NYC throwback continues 🙈 @newyorkpilates )