Today dad had this great idea to go play outside in the fresh snow. It might have been one of his worst ideas yet. I’m not a fan of this cold white stuff. ❄️⛄️
2 1024 minutes ago
Sammy boo... today Dr. Lavin came in while I was holding you, recovering from my c-section, and told us that the nurses were concerned that you may have Down syndrome. Your daddy and I were shocked. What were they talking about? You were perfect!
She rattled off things like upturned eyes, thick neck, and a gap between your toes. “Thomas has a gap in his toes,” I said. “Maybe it’s just a hereditary thing.” She could tell that we were getting distressed, and said that perhaps they were wrong, but they were going to draw some blood and send it off to be karyotyped to be sure. “Okay,” we said, knowing full well that they were just covering their bases and that it would come back negative.
But they had planted a seed, and instead of holding you and spending time with you, we Googled. We looked up images of babies with Down syndrome and compared them to you. We read things like “limp noodle” and floppy” but that wasn’t you. You were strong! You were already trying to nurse and lift your head. They were wrong. They had to be wrong. But your hands and feet were still blue, and you had a heart murmur.
That night, they came to take you away because your oxygen was so low. You were not even two days old. I wish now that we had enjoyed our time with you instead of worrying about your extra chromosome, because you spent two weeks hooked up to oxygen and I couldn’t take you home. And your daddy and I knew that they were not wrong, and we were sad for you.
The test came back and it was positive. We will never forget those first two days. How silly we were for worrying. Because you are amazing, Sam! You have already accomplished so much. You learned to clap and get on all fours in the last few days. You’re starting to like “people food”. Your smile is infectious, and random people in the grocery store will stop me and comment on how cute you are and how beautiful your eyes are. “He has the most beautiful blue eyes!” they always say. (Continued in comments)